Sometimes I cry when I watch HGTV cuz I’m like “I’m never gonna be on Fixer Upper”. Unless I move to Texas, but I don’t want to move to Texas. Nothing against Texas, I just want to live where I live now and I actually lived in Texas once, so I can say I tried it. Plus I don’t even make enough money to save for a house in Texas, so that’s not really an option for me right now either.
Frequently I worry about never owning my own home, but then I’m like “Why do I need to own a home?” People in big cities don’t always own their own homes, they rent tiny apartments, and they seem fine with it. They actually seem to love it and they can order Chinese food whenever they want. But the questions still creep into my head, and far too often than I’d like to admit: “What if I rent for the rest of my life, and will that make me less accomplished?”
It’s not like I can see into people’s homes, the ones they own, and see all the perfect moments they are experiencing because their name is on the title and they own the ground below their ridiculously comfortable, fur-lined slippers. I’m not able to observe all of their amazingly perfect moments surrounded by shiplap and marble and original wood flooring that’s been sanded down and stained to perfection. Owning a house doesn’t necessarily make it a home right? We’ve all got our struggles behind our custom plantation shutters, or in my case, our came-with-the-lease, plastic, vertical, blinds.
Most often, reality quickly strikes, I take a deep breath, look around, and know I don’t need to own my home to feel successful or grown. I know I’m doing the best I can to make my home a calm and nurturing, yet fun and creative space. My kids don’t know what the word “leasing” means. They just appreciate that we have a place to stay warm and grow and laugh and sometimes get their toys put into a big trash bag when their mom loses her mind and throws everything they love into the garage because they “forgot” to put it away after she asked them TEN times.
I guess the point of the post is: I have a garage. I have a large, leased garage where I can put stuff when people don’t listen to me. So I guess today, I win. Today, I win.